28 Jul 2010

Changed my name!!

Well actually i didn't change MY name, i'm still Hanna aka Han .. and i will NEVER change my name cos..well it might sound very sassy but i think it's the prettiest girls name (that i know of) and i'm even thinking ab naming my daughter the same...well maybe spell it different (like HannaH :D) then it won't be that weird...*thinking*..nah it will be who whatever, i love it!
Anyhow,..but i changed my blogs name. WHY? you might ask.. well first of all cos i can and cos i have a plan of doing a small business and Ms.Han will be my signature name so therefore i though it's good to change this blogs name as well.
I was thinking of Ms. Han's mõttemaailm..but well Ms. Han is in English so if the second part was going to be in Estonian..it wouldn't have looked nice. And changing Ms. Han...just won't work! So that's that -- Ms. Han's wonderland -- (my 1st option was Ms'Han's memorandum but that was too cheesy) it imparts the message ("my" way of thinking).. If you have a better word for memorandum, comment ab. it below! Remember, i can still change it! :B

26 Jul 2010

Puhtuse kinnituseks halastuseta läbikatsumine

Psalm 26:1-8
Mõista mulle kohut, Issand,
sest ma olen elanud laitmatuses
ja olen lootnud Issanda peale
ilma kõikumata!
2Katsu mind läbi, Issand,
ja proovi mind,
sulata mu neerud ja mu süda!
3Sest sinu heldus on mu silma ees
ja ma käin sinu tões.
4Ma ei ole istunud koos
valelike inimestega
ega lähe kaasa salalikega.
5Ma vihkan kurjade kogu
ega istu õelate kilda.
6Ma pesen oma käsi süütuses
ja käin sinu altari ümber, Issand,
7et kuuldavale tuua tänu
ja jutustada kõiki su imeasju.
8Issand, ma armastan
su koja asukohta
ja su auhiilguse asupaika!

See kirjakoht räägib minu jaoks midagi hämmastavat; mõtlesin oma mõtteid jagada.

Just hiljaaegu kuulsin kedagi ütlevat, et esimene kord räägib (korrigeerib) Jumal läbi Oma sõna, teine kord läbi sinu elu - ehk siis, kui Ta räägib (läbi Oma sõna) ja sa ei kuula, laseb Ta sul selle läbi elada ning seeläbi õppida - su oma valik!!!!!
Ma arvan, et on vähe neid, kes tulevad Jumala ette ja ütlevad et "Jumal mõista mu üle rangelt kohut ja korrigeeri mind halastuseta, et ma võiksin Sind paremini teenida", nagu Rick Joyner seda palvetas (raamatust "Põrgu väed on rünnakul"). Ma tegin seda ise päris pikka aega (ikka aastaid) ning ütlen ausalt, Jumal tuli ja korrigeeris ka ja need ajad on mu elu ühed raskemad kuid muutusterohkemad ajad. Enam ma seda palvet nii naljalt ei palveta. Mõte jääb mu palvetes alati samas - ma tahan pidevalt muutuda ja saada rohkem Kristuse sarnaseks ning rohkem ja paremini Kristust teenida, kuid nagu Jeremija kirjutas (10:24) Karista mind, Jehoova, aga õiglaselt, mitte oma vihas, et Sa mind ei hävitaks! Ma olen päris kindel, et ka Jeremija oli kogenud Jumala ranget kohtumõistmist ja halastuseta korrigeerimist!

Hoolimata kõigest, on meie eesmärk, nüüd rohkem kui iial varem, täie pühendumisega joosta edasi ja edasi ja mitte sammugi tagasi. Vanad asjad ei tohi jääda meile komistuskiviks ette. Kui sul on olnud minevikus kogemusi Jumalaga, kus sa ei ole saanud vastuseid, mis on su usku nõrgestanud, siis ka see ei tohi saada takistuseks, sest pea ühte asja meeles..asi ei olnud Jumalas (ps. mine loe ka minu viimast blogi, käsitlesin seal seda teemat). Jesaja ütleb, et (43:18-19) Ärge tuletage meelde endisi asju ja ärge pange tähele, mis muiste on sündinud! Vaata, Mina teen hoopis uut; see juba tärkab, kas te ei märka? Ma teen kõrbegi tee, tühjale maale jõed! Niisiis edasi minnes ainult muutudes ja puhastudes, sest et nüüd rohkem kui varem, järjest enam tõusevad esile tõelised jüngrid ja need kelle südamed on tõeliselt klammerdunud Jumala külge ning kelle ainus ja siiras eesmärk on elada Temale!

Seda (esimest) kirjakohta aga vaadates hämmastab mind millise kindlameelsusega Taavet pöördub Jumala poole ja nagu esitab Jumalale väljakutse, et "testi mind, ma olen elanud puhtana ja Sinu sõna kohaselt", "katsu mind läbi, sest ma tean et ma ei ole teinud kompromisse" jne..
Tegelikult ongi ju nii, et kui sul ei ole midagi Jumala eest peita või varjata (üleastumist, pattu jne), siis pole ka miskit mis takistaks sind kindlameelselt Jumala ette astumast! Ja sellepärast Taavel oli samuti nii kindel neid sõnu rääkides. Vaadates Taaveti elu, oli see lause uskumatu --
ok enamus meist teavad Taavetit kui Psalmide kirjutaja, karjane, poeet, hiiglase-tapja, kuningas, Jeesuse esivanem.. ja ma ei taha küll seda pilti teile nüüd ära rikkuda, aga selle kõrval oli ta ka reetur, valetaja, abielurikkuja ja mõrvar.. sellisel juhul tekib küsimus MIKS mäletatakse Taavetit kui Iisraeli suurimat kuningat, temale osutatakse kui Jeesuse esivanemale, ta on üks usukangelastest (Hb 11), kuid kõige enam, teda kirjeldab Jumal ise kui "mees Minu südame järgi". MIKS SEE ON NII? .. sest et Taaveti patukahetsus oli siiras, põhjalik ja lõplik!!

Ma küll ei ole abielurikkuja ja ma ei ole kedagi tapnud, aga ma tean üht..patt on patt ja iga patukahetsus peab olema siiras, põhjalik ja lõplik! ning iga patt peab saama kahetsetud, et see saaks eemaldatud! Ja ma tean seda et holimata mineviku kogemustest..inimestega või Jumalaga, kui mu patukahetsus on siiras, siis Kristuse veri on ka katnud ja pesnud mu patu ning ma võin tulla sama kindlalt ja sama julgelt Jumala ette ja öelda, testi mind!, katsu mind läbi!, kui Taavet seda tegi!


/Ms.Han

21 Jul 2010

..What happened ?

Im sure we've all had the situations where we take a word from God, believe it, live it, breathe it, declare it etc...so we know it to be true, we know it will happen, we don't question or doubt it... that's kinda the bases for it to happen..and it WON'T. So the next question is why not?, what happened?
>> Mark this..i'm talking about if you KNOW it's God's will and it's God's will for you and you've tested it and got a confirmation etc. so...we're not talking ab the situations here where YOU think it's God's will but really, it isn't << Just recently i had the same situation. There's something i held on to and honestly really truly believed it was gonna happen...but it didn't. So at first i didn't think about it cos i was afraid i was gonna get upset w/ God and then i understood God can handle me...and i opened up and shared my thoughts w/ God and asked Him ab His..

1. Did u get it right? Often christians think they get God's word but not really getting it at all. Like God has gazillion different sides.. as in if He says smth, He says the truth but He might not mean it the way you do.. the question is if i get it the right way or i get the main idea but won't specify the details.
Ex: i got my thesis D. I prayed for, expected and was sure i was gonna get an A. my first question to God was..WHY??--You promised me an A (and i gave my maximum).. Then one day i was talking to my friend and said that yes even tho i got my thesis a D i've got SO MUCH out of it-- without it i couldn't do the work that i'm doing not and help prostitutes and HT victims. So then my friend said..well if you gave your best, you got the maximum out of it and it's the basis to your work now...then it's basically written for an A.. even tho uni didn't grade it so.. (im not sure if i conveyed the thought)..

2. Obedient or not? THe big question is ..are you obedient to God. God sees the big picture, right?..so if there are changes to be made, He'll direct you to doing them. Now if you think you know better and won't do it..it might just happen that you won't get your thing. If there are other people involved w/ the thing you are expecting or waiting from God..you gotta understand they have a role to play aswell. Especially if the thing is between 2 people. YOU might be obedient to God..but the other person might not be, which can delay what you are waiting for.

3. Testing and being tested?! With holding on to God's word and expecting what you're expecting..you are kinda testing God. But in a good way! You believe and know that He will do what He has promised. As we know, God wants THE BEST for us. So what if things aren't going as YOU planned, does it affect your faith or the way you see, look at God? Things might go the way you don't want them to go .. cos God is testing you! How strong you are? How faithful you are? What's really inside you etc.
Ex: I said to my friend.. even if things are not gonna go as i wish they'd go or as i hope they'll go it won't affect my rel. w/ God cos i still want Him and still wanna live for Him and serve Him etc...so i'm just gonna continue w/ my life..and definitely w/ GOD!
So things didn't go as i expected them to go..but i told it to God already few times and i'll say it again..I TRUST GOD! He sees the bigger picture and He controls everything..and HE wants the best for me-- that's kinda all i need to know!

4. Gave up? Devil's main purpose is to steal, kill and destroy! So if you give up believing (even for a shot time) or start doubting or chicken out, it can hinder what God is planning for you. Stand firm and hold on to what God has told you!

5. Prayed recently? If God has told you ab His plans or smth, remember you have a job to do aswell. Well yes, you have to be obedient and do what God tells you to do .. but you have to pray ab it too. You gotta fight for what you want and for what God want's for you. No good thing is for free and the bigger the victory, the bigger the price aswell. So maybe you've heard the saying: You can see how much a man wants something by how much he's willing to fight for it. And my dad has always said: If you want something you'll find a way to get it! So..have you, did you pray about it??????? Pray! FIGHT for it! It's totally worth it.. Go beyond the lines to get it (even fast if you feels it's a good thing to do).


These are my thoughts. Hopefully it helped some of you!
If you have any questions or any comments, leave them below!


Ms.Han